An early candidate for Scariest Thing Overheard on the bus this morning:

Well, my instructions were to roast it, and I did, but it filled the house with the most gawd-awful smell. She paused, considering. It smelled, she went on in a matter-of-fact tone, like human flesh.

After a discreet few moments, I turned casually to get a look at this woman who recognizes the smell of human flesh roasting. Just don't eat the brain, Ma'am, I longed to say.